We all live inside of self-constructed boxes. I’m not talking about boxes built out of wood, concrete and sheetrock. I’m talking about boxes that we build out of our memories, beliefs and the words we use to talk about ourselves. The primary purpose of our boxes is to make us feel safe and secure. Some […]
Author Archive | Jake Eagle
There is a time to whine
In my office I have a sign that my clients can see from their chair. It says, “Thou Shalt Not Whine.” It’s partially meant to be a joke, but it’s also indicative of my approach to therapy. I’ll say more about that in a minute, but in this article I want to acknowledge that I’ve […]
The Story Of All Stories
Once upon a time there was a story . . . a story that helped people to change their lives. The story teller was a man made of sand. Depending on how the wind blew, he would take on different shapes. So everyday he had a different appearance. When I stopped to look at the […]
The Worst Thing I Almost Ever Did To Myself
If you consistently read our blogs you know that, recently, my mother passed away. The way I have processed her death has been very—I’m searching for the right word—nourishing, affirming, enlightening. These seem like strange words to use when talking about losing someone I dearly love. Yet, I feel good about the way I spontaneously […]
Happy New Year 2015
Hannah and I want to wish you a Happy New Year — we hope you make it wonderful. I believe that I’m more likely to have a wonderful New Year if I slow down long enough to ask, “How will I be a better person in 2015?” If I were to use Perception Language to […]
The Hole In My Heart
Do you have a hole in your heart? Have you had different romantic partners, but the basic dynamic between you remains the same? The dynamic, in short, is this—you don’t get what you want. Somehow you keep making the same mistake, either choosing the wrong person or looking for the wrong thing from the person […]
Why Not Be Present? There’s A good Reason
Life is difficult There is a simple reason why most people choose to not be present in their lives. It’s because being present sucks—if you don’t like your job, don’t get along with your partner or don’t feel good in your body—and therefore you’d rather be someplace else. I remember many years ago when I […]
A Remarkable Woman — my mom
How old do you feel like you are? It was about a week ago when I asked my mother, “How old do you feel like you are?” She said, “Twenty-three.” And if I were to measure her by her spirit and enthusiasm for life I would agree. In physical years she is eighty-nine—and dying. She […]
Make The Most of NOW
Do you want to be happy? Do you want to live with an open heart? Do you want to conduct yourself so that you feel good about yourself? All of this is possible—the key is learning to do two things. Not “learning two things,” but “learning TO DO two things.” Both of which I wish […]
The Faster You Run The Longer It Takes To Get There
Run from what? And where is there? This past week I worked with a couple of different clients who have made remarkable progress in terms of their personal growth and maturity. Both men. One thirty-years-old, the other forty. Good looking to boot. What they are both doing is slowing down and accepting, maybe even embracing, […]