Do you get what you want in your life? I’m not talking about material things; I’m talking about your primary relationships. Does your partner give you what you want? Are you treated the ways you want to be treated? Do you receive from your partner the things you most want from him or her? What […]
Tag Archives | Intimacy
Happy Couples — Day 8 — Maya Tulum
We are at the end—the physical end—of this Live Conscious Retreat, in Maya Tulum. But I don’t think of this as an end, instead it is a beginning for the people who came together for the past eight days. As we learned to use a new set of communication tools and we lived together in […]
Individuate (two me’s create a we) — Day 5 — Maya Tulum
It’s day 5 of our winter retreat and today we explored the stages of human development from approximately age twenty until the time when we become elders. One of the most significant things that happens during these stages is that we individuate from our parents—this is a time of letting go, learning to stand on […]
How to Individuate | Step Three
The final stage in the process of individuation is reconnecting with the person you individuated from and interacting with them without losing yourself. This is not always possible. But you won’t know until you go through the stages of declaring and separating, which I previously wrote about. This final stage involves making new agreements, but […]
How To Individuate | Step Two
This post explores how to individuate by taking the second step in the three step process. In an earlier post I wrote generally about the individuation process. I identified three stages: Declaring Separating Reconnecting I’ve written about declaring, and now I want to address the next step, separating. How To Individuate: Step Two To separate […]
A Mother’s Unconditional Love
A dear client of mine recently had to say goodbye to her mother who passed away three months after being diagnosed with cancer. My client fully participated in her mother’s dying process. Much healing occurred as the daughter accompanied her mother down the last part of the river of life’s journey, to the final waterfall, […]
What Should I Expect From My Relationship?
What should I expect from my relationship? This is such an important question, and one that many couples never ask or answer. It really comes down to understanding and agreeing on our rights and responsibilities.
Leaving a Relationship: The Easy Way Out? | Huffington Post
As a practicing therapist, working with many couples over the past 20 years, I disagree with Dr. Margaret’s Paul’s recent article in the Huffington Post, Leaving A Relationship: The Easy Way Out?, wherein she proclaims that difficult relationships are fodder for personal growth and that relationships are hard work. If you believe this, you’re in […]
Why Do I Keep Choosing The Wrong Partner?
In my previous postings, “How to Find a Good Man” and “How to Find a Good Woman,” I emphasized that early in the dating stage you need to be rather intolerant. I’d like to say more about this. If you’re trying to find a good partner—male or female—one key is to apply your criteria before […]
How To Find A Good Woman
In an earlier posting I wrote about how to find a good man . Most everything I said applies to finding a good woman, so please reference that post. However, here are a few more specific comments. By the way, there’s a lot more interest expressed by women trying to find a good man than […]