Do you want to be happy? Do you want to live with an open heart? Do you want to conduct yourself so that you feel good about yourself? All of this is possible—the key is learning to do two things. Not “learning two things,” but “learning TO DO two things.” Both of which I wish […]
Tag Archives | Self discovery
Being Perfect
“The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.” ~ Anna Quindlen I recently returned from someone else’s 5-day workshop. I do this every year—attend a workshop—to keep myself growing and to stimulate my creativity for our own retreats. As usual, I chose […]
I Never Step In The Same River Twice
For a dozen years, I attended a lot of meditation retreats. Two or three times a year I immersed myself in the practice, for week-long intensives. Before each new Zen ‘sesshin’, as they were called, or Vipassana retreat, I struggled with whether to take the time out of my life, my work, parenting, diminish my […]
Finding Yourself – A Love Story
Finding yourself is a journey Finally, one perfect day in early July, I arrive in northern New Mexico with comfortable clothes, a journal, sunscreen, a jacket for cool nights, and rain gear. I’m aware that I’m carrying my interior baggage as well—hoping that someone will be heavier than I, uglier, older, more insecure, more anxious, […]
Being Human
Feel stuck? How do you un-stick yourself? By being human. I recently had a patient come in, a lovely, fairly successful, quite confident teacher in the field of personal growth. She was feeling stuck in her life. She could not motivate herself to do the things she needed to do to promote her work, something […]
What’s Good Enough?
Do People Really Do The Best They Can? Have you heard the expression, “People do the best they can”? Do you believe that? Really? You believe that a father who abused his daughter did the best he could? You believe that a wife who cheated on her husband did the best she could? You believe […]
Personal Narrative — Day 6 — Maya Tulum
Since early on in this retreat the participants have been thinking and working on what we call a “personal narrative.” The idea behind your personal narrative is that you have a story—you may not be conscious of your story—but you have a story. Is your story—your narrative—healthy? Is your personal narrative one that makes […]
The One Simple Thing That Will Change Your Life
Today is Martin Luther King Day. Consider how vitally alive he was while he lived. He did not waste his short but ‘chosen’ life. Have you chosen the life you are living? If not, what is one simple thing you could do to change your life? Or what one thing could you do that would […]
Enlightenment Can Lead To Arrogance
What is enlightenment? I see it as a state of constructive contentment. That is, being constructive—making some sort of contribution—and feeling satisfied at the same time. One of the things about this state of being is that it feeds on itself. If I am content and constructive in this moment, I am likely to be […]
How to Individuate | Step Three
The final stage in the process of individuation is reconnecting with the person you individuated from and interacting with them without losing yourself. This is not always possible. But you won’t know until you go through the stages of declaring and separating, which I previously wrote about. This final stage involves making new agreements, but […]